猫咪社区

When it comes to social media etiquette, we are all still learning how to interact with each other while respecting boundaries and the spaces we give ourselves.

What has translated straight over from our in-person interactions are racist, sexist, and ableist micro- and macroaggressions. How do we navigate those? Well, it would help if folks with privilege recognized the ways in which they are routinely demanding labor from marginalized people online.

In regards to White folks and their anti-Blackness, here is a list of 10 ways they can stop annoying people of color on social media.

1. When we post about racism鈥�like being called racist names, racial harassment, feelings about being called racist things, or being racially harassed鈥攕top saying you鈥檙e shocked. Don鈥檛 say, 鈥淚 can鈥檛 believe this still happens.鈥澛�Don鈥檛 tell us all the ways you鈥檙e surprised, because you鈥檙e either lying or haven鈥檛 been paying attention. Don鈥檛 show us how much you don鈥檛 listen when we talk by carelessly stating 鈥渟hock.鈥� Think about what it says to us about how you see us before you say something.

It鈥檚 not about you personally unless you personally caused the problem.

2. When we share whatever flavor of racial pain we鈥檙e in, don鈥檛 proclaim what a good White person you personally are and then go on to tell a story about that time you rescued a poor Black child from the ghetto. We don鈥檛 want to hear about that time you bought some jammy pants that gave 5 cents to an elephant in India or whatever. Just don鈥檛 do it because it鈥檚 not about you personally unless you personally caused the problem. If you want to tell your story about what a wonderful White person you are, take it to your own space because we鈥檙e not here for it.

3. Related to number 2, say you come across a post on Facebook and there is a lengthy thread where people of color are going off about how terrible White people are: Don鈥檛 be the White person to #notallwhitepeople the thing. If you are personally offended by the 鈥渟tereotyping鈥� and 鈥済eneralizations鈥� of a group of people either sharing their pain or cracking jokes about Whitey, calm the hell down. There is not a comment thread long enough. You, singular Good White Person, cannot be the savior of Whiteness.

4. Not all conversations need your stories about something tangentially related. For example, a group of Black folks on social media are talking about hair issues. Maybe we鈥檙e talking about things like little Black girls being threatened with suspension from school for聽聽or wearing braids. Maybe we鈥檙e talking about living in majority-White cities and not being able to find certain products, whatever. Mind. Your. Own. Business. The time someone told a Blonde joke that hurt your feelings or the glossy lady-rag article you read that says curly hair isn鈥檛 serious鈥攑lease do not insert yourself. Stay in your lane.

5. If you don鈥檛 understand a Black colloquialism, African American Vernacular English, or other brown people slang, do not start yammering about the demise of the English language and how terrible slang is. AAVE is among the most vibrant and ever-changing dialects of the English language. So don鈥檛. If you don鈥檛 understand, Google before you ask or just deal with the fact that it isn鈥檛 for you.

You don鈥檛 have to be confrontational, you don鈥檛 have to ride to the rescue.

6. Related to number 5, think about how you use AAVE. Do you use it when you want to feel sassy? If the only use for Blackness you have is to consume it and regurgitate it, skip it. Quote Miley Cyrus or Katy Perry or somebody until Blackness means more to you than two seconds of cachet or sass.

7. Stop letting your white friends act like a-holes on your friends鈥� posts. You don鈥檛 have to be confrontational, you don鈥檛 have to ride to the rescue. You can say to your friend, This is not appropriate, here, I am sending you a message so that we can talk. Handle your own people.

8. If ignorance suddenly turns you into the sort of person who leaves 4 inches worth of a comment on a Facebook thread where you police tone, demand emotional labor, and refuse to do your own research鈥攋ust stop. Your anti-Black biases are making you perceive our responses as aggressive thanks to racist tropes like the Angry Black Woman. There is nothing gentle about racism, and our responses to it don鈥檛 warrant subtlety or kindness in return.

9. Don鈥檛 ask us why we hate White people. Just don鈥檛. Please stop. Don鈥檛 commend us if we decide to say not all white people, don鈥檛 demand to a light on you for being The One Truly Good White Person.

10. If reading this list has you furiously writing up a long comment聽to explain to me how you鈥檙e not the problem, how racism is bad, how I don鈥檛 really know the struggle, if you are earnestly going to #notallwhitewomen and/or #notallwhitepeople me鈥攜ou ain鈥檛 ready. If you believe this is directed at you personally鈥攊t definitely is.

This article was originally published by . It had been edited for 猫咪社区! Magazine.聽